A little too late...

Today I saw a commercial...

Do health issues limit your mobility?
Is it difficult to get to the bathroom on your own?
Do you feel like a bother to others due to your lack of mobility?
Have you fallen in the last 12 months?


It tells me I may have been eligible for a scooter at little to no cost. Why the hell didn't I see that commercial sooner?

Let's look back...

1. Do health issues limit your mobility? - Well, does Flat Jessica look like she is enjoying her drink as much as real Dusty???

We had scheduled a 2 week Caribbean cruise before I got pregnant and since Dusty's parents and Chris and Michelle were going, I thought it would be best Dusty go on the cruise without me... well, without the Real Jessica. Flat Jessica went along for the ride while Real Jessica was at home in bed hooked up to an IV yakking her guts out. I would say definitely limited mobility.

2. Is it difficult to go to the bathroom on your own? - I would say so since there were a few times I didn't make it in time... not that I think the scooter would have helped that problem. I probably would have ended up running over Simba and then still pee'ing on myself. (Sorry no picture for that one...)

3. Do you feel like a bother to others due to your lack of mobility? - Simba seemed to be bothered by the bump.



4. And lastly, have you fallen in the last 12 months? - Well, if they know me, they would know that doesn't take me being pregnant since I am the queen of klutziness, but I did have a pretty bad fall. While walking down some steps at work, one step jumped out at me and I tripped and fell. Embarrassed, I quickly got up and hobbled back to my building. By the time I got back, my ankle was huge. It took a few days for the swelling to go down and for most that saw it, they just thought my ankles were swollen from the pregnancy (although you have to wonder when one is 3 times bigger than the other)

Anyway, moral of the story, for all the pregnant women out there, will someone please call and and see they qualify for a scooter? Someone needs to have the fun I was too late for.